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Blinker

Every once in awhile (it doesn't happen often) I forget to put the radio on in the car. Today was one of those days, and I didn't realize it until I actually HEARD the blinker blinking. The only time I ever hear the blinker is when the radio is off because I forget to turn it on or the radio is off because someone in the car is mad at me and we're having a fight and therefore the radio cannot be on -- (I never really understood why people do this but it's happened to me enough where I'm actually writing about it.)

I don't like the sound of that blinker.

Twitter In Real Life

This had me laughing out loud! If you know about Twitter, you will love this video. If you don't know about Twitter, WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN!??!

http://comedyjuice.com/2009/04/real-life-twitter.html

This Is Life

I just had a flashback to something my sister used to say. She used to hear my dad say, "This is the life." He mostly said it sitting by the lake in Maine. For whatever reason, Erin picked up on it and when she was little I heard her say, "Ah... this is life." She left the "the" out. Come to think of it, I like it better that way.

Robin Williams

Robin Williams looks like he's impossible to work with. For this reason alone, I love him. There's something happening in his head that no one understands. I can relate to that.
-- Sent from my mobile device

Rapping Flight Attendant

If you're not clapping by the middle of this, I don't want to know you.

Both Sides of Technology

When I watch old movies I find myself becoming nostalgic for a time I never lived through. It was all so simple then. And the movies don't even have to be that old. Even movies made in the 80s and 90s make me wish for simpler times. It used to be that if a boy liked you he had to call you and think of things to say to you once he got you on the phone. Now, we accept a "hey what's up" text in place of a real conversation.

I love technology, I really do, but I wish this hadn't happened. I can remember my first boyfriend having to call my parents' house to talk to me. Many times he had to get through my dad before he could talk to me. That never happens now. Most kids have cell phones and most text rather than talk.

I can remember running to the mailbox to retrieve love letters from my first boyfriend. I can't imagine that happens much anymore. People get love emails.

It's kind of a shame that you can now set up a date online with someone that you've never seen or met. It takes all the "courting" out of dating. I'm not old-fashioned, but these are some of the things I miss. Remember that nervousness you got when you stared at the phone thinking of things to say to the boy once you got him on the phone? Or remember waiting for his call? I haven't had that feeling in a long time. I hope kids today get to experience something like that feeling we used to get.

I'm part of the generation that can truly remember both sides of the technology revolution. And it happened fast. When I entered college I had a word processor that I carried around campus and a Nokia cell phone that was as big as my head that I was only to use in case of emergency. One person on our floor had a personal computer. If I wanted to talk to my boyfriend I had to be in my room when he called, and vice versa. Texting didn't exist, or if it did, no one knew about it. I remember receiving my first text message in 2003... three years after I left college.

When I left college I had a computer and printer in my dorm room and my very own cell phone. And now I have to have every gadget as soon as it comes out as long as I can afford it. So I'm in a conundrum. As much as I think technology is wonderful, I'm always a little mad at it for what it's taken away from us.

Play Date

Just out of curiosity, when and why did people start saying this? It's all I ever hear now... "Jimmy has a play date with Billy." What the hell is that?! When we were little, I said to my mom, "Mom, can Amy come over / sleep over / go on vacation with us?" I never said, "Can Amy and I have a play date?" It sounds so dumb and I wish people would stop saying it. Your kids shouldn't be dating this young anyway.

In other news, I have a play date with Teeny today.

Susan Boyle - Jimmy Fallon

This made my entire morning. If you like Susan Boyle, you'll love Jimmy Fallon and the cast of his show sitting in a conference room watching Susan Boyle.

IQ Test

Someone on my facebook challenged me to an IQ test. This was the first question:

"Frank is taller than John, Ralph is taller than Frank. Therefore, John is the shortest." (True/False)

My answer: I DON'T CARE and I'm not taking this stupid test.

Francis Bean

Francis Bean Cobain is 17. We should be hearing from her publicist
soon. She's due for socialite status.

--
Sent from my mobile device

As long as we're on the subject...

When I was younger and saw this on Sesame Street, I thought those old ladies working at the crayon factory had the coolest jobs in the world. Now, well... I guess I still think that.



I liked this one because the guy fought for the letter "J":



And this one is obviously new and I have been laughing out loud to it for the past 5 minutes:

People My Age

If anyone wonders why people my age are all screwed up, they can now blame the shows we watched as children. Namely, this clip from Sesame Street, in which a young girl with a mullet and no front teeth takes her llama to the dentist... alone. It's a wonder our generation isn't more screwed up.

Confession: I still sing this song to myself. A lot.

Muppet Scat

Last night on The Daily Show, Jon Stewart talked about the hijacking of the Maersk Alabama and the Naval base near Manama. He brought up this old clip from the Muppet show and asked viewers to Google "Muppet Scat." The rest is web history (and I LOVED this bit on the Muppet Show.) It'll be in your head all day now. It's currently the number 1 search on Google Hot Trends.

LOL

Dear Frozen Pizza People,

It's like you're not even trying anymore.

Love,
me

GPS

So I get in the car tonight and my GPS gave me an error message that basically said, "Hey, there's no maps on here." And I get this message AFTER I perform a Map Update. Doesn't seem like such a great update if all it does is erase all of my maps.

Get your act together, Garmin. I need your assistance on Monday to get me to the post office that couldn't find my house if I had flood lights shining on it.
-- Sent from my mobile device

Things I Don't Understand

1. Why can't DVRs be "smart" and figure out when a show is going over its alloted time and compensate for it? I know it can be done. If a robot can vacuum my floors and a GPS can find my location instantly, then DVRs can be smarter.

2. Math.

3. Why my mail can't figure out how to get to my house. Maybe we should go back to the Pony Express. I'm actually at the point where I'm going to have to visit the post office IN PERSON like it's 1900.

4. Gary Busey's teeth.

5. My teeth.

6. Weather.

7. Why customer service reps have to be SO dumb.

8. The traffic patterns in Fairfield County. And by "patterns" I mean why is there traffic all the time?

9. Math.

10. Math.

Adam Lambert - Mad World

For all of us who didn't see Adam last night because our DVRs cut him off, here it is. Some of the video doesn't fit on the page but you can hear it fine. Just listen. Superstar:

Please donate to this cause!

Many of you who read my blog know my friend Amy Froebel. Her sister's name is Betsy Udal and she's doing an amazing bike ride soon to benefit The Hole in the Wall Gang Camp (founded by Paul Newman in 1988.) I don't have much money to give at this point, but even I gave a little... so there's no excuse for the rest of you :) This is the best thing I can think of to spend my money on.

You can read Betsy's email below (which brought tears to my eyes) and then you can decide for yourselves. No pressure :)

******************************************************

Hello All-
This is obviously a mass email to most everyone in my email address book, so if I have already talked to you about the bike ride I am doing, please disregard this email.

Over Memorial Day weekend, I am going to ride my bike 135 miles to raise money for the Hole in the Wall Gang Camp's Hospital Outreach program. The Hole in the Wall Gang Camp is a camp in Ashford, CT that was started by Paul Newman in 1988 and serves children with serious illnesses. Their Hospital Outreach Program brings camp to the hospital for the kids that are too sick to leave and attend the facility in Ashford.



I did this bike ride in 2007 with my mom and Matt. It is hard and long with a lot of ups and downs, but they set the ride up to be that way to mimic what a sick child feels. Saturday is the first day of the ride, and we will ride 85 hilly, CT miles. The ride ends on Saturday at the camp, where we get to spend the night. I remember in 2007 feeling exhauseted and sore the last 5 miles, as we had to pedal uphill to reach the resting spot. But when you reach camp, you feel completely different. You are greeted by friendly faces, and the mood there is positive and exciting. It is magical. It is exactly what a sick child experiences when they have a chance to attend this camp. They become just a child that is sick instead of a sick person that is a child. It is amazing.

Day 2 goes from Ashford to Mystic, CT. It is 50 miles, and while is it less hilly then day 1, your body aches and all you can think about it the finish line. But along the way at some of the rest stops you get to meet some kids with some very seriousl illnesses, and suddenly 50 miles doesn't seem so bad.

I am sending you this email because I have personally committed to raise $1,000 by May, 100% of which goes directly to the Hospital Outreach Program. So far I am at $250. I have a long way to go, but I often remind myself that most things in life are easier than being an ill child.

I know times are tough for a lot of people and that many of you already give to other charities and programs, so I understand if this is not one of them. But if you are able to give, please consider donating to my ride. No amount is too small; it is all appreciated greatly.

Please click on the link below to make a donation.

Regards,
Betsy Udal

http://www.teamholeinthewall.org/Page.aspx?pid=474&frsid=1796

INCREDIBLE

I could say a lot of things about the greatness of country music, but for now I'll just say they sure know how to honor our troops. Stunning. Chills and tears.



Trace Adkins and the West Point Cadet Glee Club, at the ACMAs

English majors

This probably explains my feelings about my college degree better than I could ever hope to:

Mr. Clemente said, "Put your heads down on your desks and listen to the rain." I didn't know then that I wanted to be a writer, but I knew this was magic and I wanted more and more of it. English majors in college show up in my writing workshops years later, after trying a career in another field, because a dream was born in them back in school when they read Dostoyevsky, Thomas Mann and Virginia Woolf, and they can't get it out of their heads. So after a few years as computer programmers, they see it doesn't give them that hard rain in the afternoon outside the window. They know there is something else and that it's in their own brain. I honor English majors. It's a dumb thing to major in. It leads nowhere. It's good to be dumb, it allows us to love for no reason. That's the best kind of love."

Natalie Goldberg, Wild Mind

My favorite Office quotes - from 2006

Some things are just timeless...


Michael: "Toby is in HR, which technically means he works for corporate, so he's really not a part of our family. Also, he's divorced, so he's really not a part of his family."

Dwight: "I have been Michael's number two guy for about 5 years. And we make a great team. We're like one of those classic famous teams. He's like Mozart and I'm like... Mozart's friend. No. I'm like Butch Cassidy and Michael is like... Mozart. You try and hurt Mozart? You're gonna get a bullet in your head courtesy of Butch Cassidy."

Michael: "Yes, I was the first one out. And yes, I've heard "women and children first." But, we do not employ children. We are not a sweatshop, thankfully. And women are equal in the workplace by law. So if I let them out first, I have a lawsuit on my hands."

Pam: "Last year, my performance review started with Michael asking me what my hopes and dreams were and ended with him telling me he could bench press 190 pounds."

Michael: "Would I rather be feared or loved? Um... Easy, both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me."

Michael: "That is a perfectly good mini Christmas tree. We are going to sell that to charity because that is what Christmas is all about."

Jim: "The Albany branch is working right through lunch, to prevent downsizing. But, Michael, he decided to extend our lunch by an hour, so that we could all go down to the dojo and watch him fight Dwight."

Michael: "New York City is like Scranton... on acid. No... speed. No... steroids."

Michael: "New York, New York. City so nice they named it twice. Manhattan is the other name."

And by far my favorite quote of this year was this:

Michael: "Why do you keep a diary?"
Dwight: "To keep secrets from my computer."

Classic.

My best relationship advice

My friends are always asking me to write this stuff down (probably because I'm kind of an expert by now.)

I'm always puzzled when women stay in relationships that they know aren't right for them. I'm probably even more puzzled when that woman is me. It's very easy and satisfying to blame society for this, to blame Hollywood. But at some point every woman has to begin to take responsibility for her own choices and her own happiness. And it's never too late.

I think that the times people choose to be silent can say a lot about them. Many people offer silence when avoiding.

I have found that if you offer up radio silence and get radio silence in return, that's the beginning of the end. A man won't accept silence if he really wants to be with you. He shows up.

That's really as simple as it sounds. When a man wants to be with you, he shows up.

When you want to be with someone, you show up. When only one person shows up, that's no longer a relationship. Pay attention to who shows up.

Better yet, pay close attention to who never leaves.

Cereal prize

I opened my cereal box this morning and there was a prize inside. Remember when we were kids and you had to dig for the prize? That was the fun part. You had to dig for the prize and destroy the box and bag and then convince your parents that you didn't destroy everything looking for the prize. You had to fill 3 bowls with cereal, get the prize and then try to get the cereal back into the box (which never happened.)

This prize that I found today was on top of the sealed bag. On top. It's a stuffed Minnie Mouse. I can't stand Minnie Mouse. And I'm upset that I didn't have to dig for it. And I'm upset that it surprised me.

It's an upsetting day all around.

Wishes

Waiting for the train I'm thinking about how much I wish I had a blog/twitter when I was commuting into the city a couple years ago. There would have been some great stuff!

I remember the time the train pulled into the station in Greenwich and I realized the zipper on the back of my skirt was broken, basically exposing my bare @ss to anyone behind me. I ran downstairs, fixed it and caught the same train.

You can't make this stuff up.
-- Sent from my mobile device